Let’s take a quick sec to talk capes. They’re all too classy. In the shows… in the fashion editors… in the fashion magazines… in fashion illustrations…

I love them, I’ve got one and well, I want another, even a summer cape ever since I saw Phoebe last week…

And so let’s put this in context… study this picture right here:

Cute, isn’t it ? Scott took it. Notice anything special ? Come on… Look closer.

Ah, voilà.

The bag, my kiddies, THE BAG! How am I supposed to wear my bag?

In position 1, when my cape is closed, the bag is UNDER the cape. You just see the bag hanging without seeing my arms, like in the photo… A touch weird, no?

It’s just less classy.

– In position 2, when my cape is open… With this one, I can hold the bag in my hand and it’s nice because you can see a little bit of my arms, but, well, when my cape is open, it’s slips down every three seconds so position 2 doesn’t really count.

That or I can walk really really straight without moving my shoulders, like C3-PO, just so the cape doesn’t fall flat on the floor.

C3-PO, love ya friend, but not so classy.

– In position 3, cape closed with just my arms sticking out of the little vents up front… But then it’s just a little hand that sticks out holding a giant bag.

Not so classy.

The result : I’ve tried everything. From the most moronic (have you ever tried to wear a shoulder bag under a cape?), to the almost-practical (a pochette, really practical when I need to haul my camera around), and then the most improbable (a backpack with a cape? Naaaah, I’m kidding).

I’ve come to this conclusion: with a cape, the only thing that I think will work is an ankle bag like Karl. Or maybe no bag at all. No living allowed.

Okay, I’ll quit it with the BS, and I’ll leave you to imagine the fiasco that happens when I have to quickdraw my camera for a photo. With my bag held out at arms length…

But I don’t care, I put my cape on even so. And I still take photos. FASHION VICTORY!!!!

Translation : Tim Sullivan